Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Friday, March 27, 2009
Okay I know I recorded the first video upside down, but I had to post it anyways ;)
So I went to my parents house to hang out with the fam and my adorable niece who I haven't seen in a while.
My dad was playing the guitar while she was singing. She wants to be a singer when she grows up, so we are encouraging her to sing and play the guitar. To me, these are the most important moments in life I try not to take for granted. Being that they are so special and I won't get this time back, I decided to record it!
I remember when she was born and I was so excited to be an aunt. Now she's already 5 turning 6 in November and I don't want her to grow anymore! I can't believe she is only 5...shes so smart, and grown for her age!
In any case, after hearing this I told my brother he should start her in singing lessons so her voice can evolve by the time she is older. Did I also mention her nick name is Miss Personality! Oh yes indeed shes full of it!
Oh how I love thee, my Alexis!
The fact that strangers, so to say, are kinder and more genuine then people who have been in my life for years put things into perspective!
Last night, before I went to sleep I told myself that I just had to let it go. See it's a hard situation that I am in, and I found out something that showed me my reality. It was hard for me to accept, but I believe it happened for a reason. It opened my eyes to a situation I was obviously naive about. I guess I like to give people the benefit of the doubt, I try to see the good instead of the bad... I can't help it, that's how I was raised.
However, I do understand things much clearer.
Always be a step a head of the game. Don't trust anyone. Depend on yourself, because you will never let yourself down, and stay positive continuing to push forward!
Whatever is supposed to happen will happen for the most part, the rest is up to me!
Everyone who continues to use people, be dishonest, and straight up assholes, remember this - KARMA IS A BITCH, YOU DON'T WANT TO MESS WITH!
Once again thanks for the luv! I hope you have a wonderful weekend ;)
Thursday, March 26, 2009
JUST BE HONEST. I AM...SO WHY CAN'T THEY?
I am so fuckin' over it! I'm tired of being nice, caring, hardworking, giving, genuine, when so many others are not...
Its just one of those weeks : /
I believe everything happens for a reason, whether good or bad. I am desperately seeking for the light at the end of the tunnel.... the meaning of my life at the moment seems to be the question, along with which way do I go? Where do I draw answers from? Where shall I look for guidance?
Thanks for those who truly care...its seems to be less and less and times goes by, but it still matters a lot to me.
Looking forward to a better day let a lone a better week ;)
Sorry for the random tidbits... I really needed to express it...
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Lately I have been feeling overwhelmed and extremely exhausted. Its frustrating because I don't know how to get it together and rejuvenate myself.
I mean how am I really supposed to maintain... a relationship, working, going to the gym, cooking, cleaning, grocery shopping, laundry, paying bills, playing with Chloe, hanging with the fam, chillin' with my peeps, attending to myself (hair, nails, shopping, etc), catch up on my shows, reading, blogging, designing, sewing, branding a company, & building an empire all at once????
Whats worse, is no one seems to understand around me! I am mentally, physically & emotionally exhausted and need a break, but unfortunately I can't because if I stop to take a break... who's going to get the shit done!
Its really hard being 23 and responsible. Sometimes I wish I could be the carefree 23 year old who just doesn't have a care in the world...but then again...that wouldn't be me! I always look ahead, planning to secure my future. I an sensible when it comes to money. I save as much as I can, always pay my bills on time, and rarely splurge.I am a very hard worker, who puts their career first...for the most part. I have always believed that If I sacrifice now, I will be able to play later...but sometimes all the hard work really knocks me down. At the end of the day I try to tell myself that I am only human, and I am doing the best that I can do...but sometimes I feel its not enough. I could always being doing more. I can sleep when I'm dead, and this is my time to grind...but it does take its toll...or at least its starting to!
Bare with me with the posts... work has been hectic, and the hubby in addition to the dog has been feeling neglected.