Ahhhh...

As I was waiting for the last hour of work to roll on by, I decided to read up on some of my past posts. It's been more than a while since I've given any attention to this blog and it was long overdue. Interesting enough, I found a couple of posts where I was truly at a crossroads in my life. Reading the thoughts that I once felt took me back to that time when I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel. Its wonderful to use writing as a way to document your journeys in life, and in return it allows you to go back and see the real growth of ones existence.

Almost a year later, I can say I am in such a great place. All of those trials I went thru last year did in fact happen for a reason. At that point, all I could see was the pain and agony of what I was going thru but in reality it set me up for where I am at today. Had I not experienced all those things, I probably would be stuck in that 8 year relationship still holding on by a thread. As much as I will always love my ex, he and I were not meant to be together, forever. We were kids, who grew up together, and in turn, held on to the memories along the way. We were scared to venture off to others, and when we did, we always ran back to each other. After a few infidelities, I finally smartened up and realized that this would be my life if I didn't make a permanent change. It took a lot of courage and tears to finally leave, but I did. I took the time to figure out what I wanted, let alone needed. I found myself, and am still very much on that journey.

I am now embarking on a new relationship with a man who is equal to me. If anything, he motivates me to be a better woman and I can honestly say he completes me. I am trying my hardest not to allow my past relationship effect my new relationship as there are in fact two different men. Am I tainted? Yes. I was lied to and cheated on more than once and I now have a hard time trusting anyone. Will I let that get in the way? Absolutely not. It would be the biggest mistake of my life if I were to allow the fear of getting hurt keep me from falling in love. This man is wonderful in so many ways and has truly showed me what a partnership is really about. The funny thing is that it is still the beginning, so there is still so much more to come...if I allow it.

Actually this past week was a big one for me. I made some significant changes in my life that will allow more love and opportunities to flow thru and I couldn't be happier. After a long time, I am finally excited about my future. I now think about marriage, kids, the whole nine...where as before...It just was not even a thought. There is still so much to be revealed as I grow into the woman that I am destined to be and I am doing it all with no regrets, or hesitance!

xoxo,

T

Real Talk: Does Time Define Us or Do We Define Time!?

Time: a moment, point, point in time, occasion, hour, minute, second, instant, juncture, stage. 

Time has a great impact on ones life. Whether that be an hour, day, week or even a year. I will be turning 25 this year and I find myself thinking about time, life, happiness, and family more than ever. Its been an ongoing search/discovery for the past 5 years. When I was younger I thought my life would be very different. I thought I had all the time in the world to do whatever, whenever I wanted. As I started to get older I started to realize this was not true. See, even though time is documented, time is still invisible. You don't find yourself staring at the clock every second of every day for the entire year. You glance at it one moment, and by the next moment you  look back, that time has passed and will not return and all while not even noticing. What you did in that time may or may have not be important but it doesn't matter because that time has already passed.

Time is linked with everything. All of your decisions are based off of timing if you really think about it. When you wake up, sleep, shower, work , eat, go out...money, love, marriage, kids, vacations, etc. Everything revolves around time.

Which brings me to my question that has had me thinking lately. Is there really such a thing called good timing? There were some events that took place a few years ago in which I had to make some important decisions. I based those decisions off of timing. I felt as though it was not good timing to proceed down a certain path. Years went by and I find myself at another place where I might have to make a difficult decision. Now there is no doubt my life has changed substantially in the past few years, but I still don't find myself at the ideal timing to make that decision. When I compare the time then to the time now, it makes me wonder if there ever will be a right timing for something or is it you making it the right timing for something by just doing so because that's what was destined to be??

Time seems to be flying by in comparison to when I was younger. One being that I have much more responsibilities, the other being that life seems a lot more complicated in general. Who ever said it gets easier as you get older obviously was either on drugs or delusional because they LIED! lol

Time is complex and quite difficult to figure out when pertaining to your life decisions.  I'm sure as time goes by, it will have a way of working itself out in conjunction with my decisions...

Do you believe in good or bad timing? Does time define us or do we define time?

Anyway, I may have made absolute no sense but i believe it writing how I feel whether it makes sense or not ;)

it's all a matter of time,

Imagery: Nature!

For all I can remember I was never the outdoor type of girl. I really didn't gain anthing per se from mother nature other then LOVING the rain. 

As I'm getting older, I have noticed a lot of things are changing about myself. Things I didn't like when I was younger I seem to LOVE now a days. One of the things I find surprising is my new found love for nature and all its simplistic beauty it has to offer.

The other day I was in the worst mood ever driving home from work. My thoughts were racing as they usually do on my drive home, when I realized it was still light out side, and the route I take is beautiful. I usually race home because who really wants to stay on the road? but for some reason I was driving slower than usual and took in all the beauty nature had to offer. Before I knew it, my bad mood had disappeared. I was so taken back by the scenery, that my mood completely changed and I started to smile.

How could I not smile. The mountains were fully covered with mossy green grass lighted by a bright blue sky. I felt as though I wasn't even in southern cali, it was so beautiful. I wanted to stop and take some pictures but I didn't have my camera on me so I plan to next weekend on my way home. It's crazy because I find myself taking more interest into my mothers amazing garden, asking her all kinds of questions regarding her plants, etc. Who knows I might even take us some gardening in the near future. My mother always says that gardening is the best medicine for a happy mind. Maybe I am just getting old, but I am definitely not entertained by the same things I was 5 years ago...

I found some pics of the back road I take home so you can get a glimpse of what I am talking about...

Maybe i've been distracted all these years from nonsense that I am now finding the true meaning of beauty and it is all natural - as it was destined to be. 

xoxo,

Real Talk: Life & Love go Hand in Hand!

You have the ability to love. And from that ability comes every ability. Love can transform your most painful burden into your richest blessing. Stop fighting against what is and begin to love what you know you can be. Live in love, and you live with power. Live in love, and enable the best within you to know full expression. Love keeps you focused on what truly matters. Love keeps you going against all odds. Let go of worry, anxiety, anger and frustration, and love is there. It shines more brightly than ever. Live in love. And you live in full.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Real Talk: Live Beyond Fear!

There is real treasure at the center of your being. Yet fear can keep that treasure hidden and inaccessible. Fear of failure can keep you from taking the steps necessary to succeed. Fear of being wrong can prevent you from making the choices that are truly right for you. Fear of loss leaves you unable to win. Fear gives power and influence to whatever it is you fear. Yet fear can exist only when you view life through the narrow window of your ego. Get beyond that ego, and fear no longer has any place to inhabit. When you view the rest of life as being separate and disconnected from you, that provides fertile ground for destructive fear. The more fully you realize and the more deeply you understand your connection to all that is, the more quickly the fears will vanish.Stop listening to your ego and you'll stop being a prisoner of fear. Think and act and feel beyond yourself and you'll live well beyond the fear.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Real Talk: Examine The Weak to Become Strong!

Don't be afraid to examine your weaknesses. In them you'll find some of your greatest potential. Certainly you can always make improvements to what you already do well. Yet at best, those will be incremental improvements. Consider, though, what happens when you work on overcoming your weaknesses. The results in your life can be revolutionary. In fact, transforming a weakness into a strength can make all your other strengths more effective. When the weakness is no longer holding you back, every part of your life will see the benefits. Be thankful for your strengths. And be honest about your weaknesses. For when you are clear about what you cannot yet do well, that's the first step to improvement. Any weakness can be transformed into strength when you simply have the courage to grow.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Real Talk: Look Within the Possibility!

You are not a victim of circumstance. You are a beneficiary of possibility.Difficult conditions do not impose a burden. They deliver opportunity, in great abundance. No matter what happens or what fails to happen, there is always a kernel of goodness and positive possibility to be found. Decide to see it, decide to harness it, decide to make the most of it, and you will. Circumstances, as powerful and disruptive as they may be, do not have any driving purpose or intention. You, on the other hand, do. When you connect with that purpose, and energize that intention, you can bring great triumph out of any situation. With a strong and clearly defined purpose, everything becomes an opportunity.

See what is, and translate it into the best of what can be. Any time is right, when you are ready.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Don't Focus on the Lost Hours of Yesterday...

I wanted to share an inspirational story that I recently read that provides you with a new perspective! Enjoy ;)

The Daffodil Principle

Several times my daughter had telephoned to say, "Mother, you must come to see the daffodils before they are over. "I wanted to go, but it was a two-hour drive from Laguna to Lake Arrowhead "I will come next Tuesday", I promised a little reluctantly on her third call.

Next Tuesday dawned cold and rainy. Still, I had promised, and reluctantly I drove there. When I finally walked into Carolyn's house I was welcomed by the joyful sounds of happy children. I delightedly hugged and greeted my grandchildren.

"Forget the daffodils, Carolyn! The road is invisible in these clouds and fog, and there is nothing in the world except you and these children that I want to see badly enough to drive another inch!"

My daughter smiled calmly and said, "We drive in this all the time, Mother." "Well, you won't get me back on the road until it clears, and then I'm heading for home!" I assured her.

"But first we're going to see the daffodils. It's just a few blocks," Carolyn said. "I'll drive. I'm used to this."

"Carolyn," I said sternly, "Please turn around." "It's all right, Mother, I promise. You will never forgive yourself if you miss this experience."

After about twenty minutes, we turned onto a small gravel road and I saw a small church. On the far side of the church, I saw a hand lettered sign with an arrow that read, "Daffodil Garden." We got out of the car, each took a child's hand, and I follow wed Carolyn down the path. Then, as we turned a corner, I looked up and gasped. Before me lay the most glorious sight.

It looked as though someone had taken a great vat of gold and poured it over the mountain peak and its surrounding slopes. The flowers were planted in majestic, swirling patterns, great ribbons and swaths of deep orange, creamy white, lemon yellow, salmon pink, and saffron and butter yellow. Each different-colored variety was planted in large groups so that it swirled and flowed like its own river with its own unique hue. There were five acres of flowers.

"Who did this?" I asked Carolyn. "Just one woman," Carolyn answered. "She lives on the property. That's her home." Carolyn pointed to a well-kept A-frame house, small and modestly sitting in the midst of all that glory. We walked up to the house.

On the patio, we saw a poster. "Answers to the Questions I Know You Are Asking", was the headline. The first answer was a simple one. "50,000 bulbs," it read. The second answer was, "One at a time, by one woman. Two hands, two feet, and one brain." The third answer was, "Began in 1958."

For me, that moment was a life-changing experience. I thought of this woman whom I had never met, who, more than forty years before, had begun, one bulb at a time, to bring her vision of beauty and joy to an obscure mountaintop. Planting one bulb at a time, year after year, this unknown woman had forever changed the world in which she lived. One day at a time, she had created something of extraordinary magnificence, beauty, and inspiration. The principle her daffodil garden taught is one of the greatest principles of celebration.

That is, learning to move toward our goals and desires one step at a time--often just one baby-step at time--and learning to love the doing, learning to use the accumulation of time. When we multiply tiny pieces of time with small increments of daily effort, we too will find we can accomplish magnificent things. We can change the world .

"It makes me sad in a way," I admitted to Carolyn. "What might I have accomplished if I had thought of a wonderful goal thirty-five or forty years ago and had worked away at it 'one bulb at a time' through all those years? Just think what I might have been able to achieve!"

My daughter summed up the message of the day in her usual direct way. "Start tomorrow", she said.

She was right. It's so pointless to think of the lost hours of yesterdays. The way to make learning a lesson of celebration instead of a cause for regret is to only ask, "How can I put this to use today?"

Use the Daffodil Principle. Stop waiting.....

>> Until your car or home is paid off...

>> Until you get a new car or home...

>> Until your kids leave the house...

>> Until you go back to school...

>> Until you finish school...

>> Until you clean the house...

>> Until you organize the garage...

>> Until you clean off your desk...

>> Until you lose 10 lbs...

>> Until you gain 10 lbs...

>> Until you get married...

>> Until you have kids...

>> Until the kids go to school...

>> Until you retire...

>> Until summer...

>> Until spring...

>> Until winter...

>> Until fall...

>> Until you die...

There is no better time than right now to be happy. Happiness is a journey, not a destination. So work like you don't need money. Love like you've never been hurt, and, Dance like no one's watching.

Wishing you a beautiful, daffodil day!

Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid that it will never begin.

xoxo,

T

Real Talk: Stay Focused!

Thousands of possibilities stream past you every day. You cannot possibly connect with, or even take notice of, most of those possibilities. So which ones do you see, and which ones are you able to fulfill? The possibilities you'll connect with are the ones that most closely align with your thoughts and your actions. Your thoughts have an incredibly powerful influence on your life, but not because those thoughts cause anything to happen on their own. Rather, certain specific thoughts enable you to tap into, and to successfully follow, certain specific possibilities. The life of your dreams is manifested not by calling upon some dark and mysterious secret power. Your dreams will be fulfilled when you tune in to and align the substance of your life with those dreams. Somewhere, in some form, every thing, every experience, every circumstance you can imagine already exists in some form or other. By focusing the energy of your life on your dream, you'll be able to successfully assemble all the pieces together. The very best possibilities for your life are already coming your way. Focus on them with sincerity and commitment, and you'll soon be moving forward right along with them.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Limelight: All That Glitters is Not Gold! Pt. 2

I'm sure most of you have watched Rihanna's 20/20 interview by now, and for those who haven't - google it. I decided not to post it being that it would simply disappear due to copyright infringement. In any case, throughout the entire interview, I felt as though she wasn't being one hundred percent honest. I am in no way excusing ones behavior, nor do I a think it is right to ever hit a woman, however I do believe it takes two to tango. After viewing this video below, it made me think even more so. If you view the behind the scenes video, you view a young woman who is anything but timid really. It's hard for me to believe someone with such self confidence & feminine power, would sit back and allow someone to brutally hurt them without throwing some punches back...

Do I think she deserved it? Absolutely not! Do I think there is more to the story then what she stated? Quite possibly, however truth be told it's really none of our 
business to ever really know ;) 
This is simply my observation to another... What do you think?

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Life: Growing Up Too Fast!

It was my nieces 6th birthday this past weekend, and like myself, she was really sick. Unfortunately too sick to go to disneyland like we planned. She started her day off crying because she was sad that she was not going to be able to do anything. I quickly decided to bring the festivities home. Obviously I couldn't bring disneyland home, but I managed to make the best of it...

We painted faces, watched movies, baked her cake, played with her gifts, did some arts & crafts and ordered in from her favorite bbq eatery, Lucille's! All in all, she said it was one of the best birthdays she had so I am happy she was happy! 

I still remember the day we rushed to the hospital waiting anxiously for her arrival. She and I have been  inseparable since birth, and at times I feel like she is my own. She is indeed growing up too fast, and at times I wish she can still be that itty bitty baby once in my arms again. However, that's life. Each year comes around celebrating one more year of progression and memories. I am so grateful to be an aunt and to have the opportunity to watch this beautiful, intelligent, & charismatic young girl flourish into such a wonderful being.

Happy Birthday Alexis, I love you more than words could ever describe!!!

Love,

Tiffy

Real Talk: Priceless Fortune

Remind yourself often of how fortunate you are. The more you realize and recall your good fortune, the more good and valuable things you can do with it. Your true fortune has little to do with the size of your bank account or your material assets. The greatest fortune you have is life itself, and the opportunity to live each moment with awareness and effectiveness. There is endless fortune in your ability to choose what to do with each moment. There is limitless fortune in your capacity to feel love, awe, compassion, gratitude and pure joy. Spend some time each day thinking about how truly fortunate you are. Let the warm feeling of that magnificent fortune permeate your awareness. Your very existence has such great and irreplaceable value that it's impossible to even imagine the full extent of it. Resolve today to make good use of all that value. The great fortune of your life is here and now. Live it with joy and meaning.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Limelight: All That Glitters is Not Gold!

No matter what she does, she will continue to get criticized as she is in the limelight, and thats the nature of the beast. However, I commend Rihanna for coming forth and sharing her side of the story not for the sake of making one look good, and the other bad, but more because she does indeed have an enormous fan base who are generally young women that may be, or have been in the same situation. After viewing the interview, those women might think twice about staying in an abusive relationship. Domestic Violence is not only serious, but so personal and for her to share her intimate story to even change one girl's perspective speaks volumes.

Here are some facts via NCADV.ORG

- One in every four women will experience domestic violence in her lifetime.

- An estimated 1.3 million women are victims of physical assault by an intimate partner each year.

- 85% of domestic violence victims are women.

- Historically, females have been most often victimized by someone they knew.

- Females who are 20-24 years of age are at the greatest risk of nonfatal intimate partner violence.

- Most cases of domestic violence are never reported to the police

- Almost one-third of female homicide victims that are reported in police records are killed by an intimate partner.

- In 70-80% of intimate partner homicides, no matter which partner was killed, the man physically abused the woman before the murder.

- Less than one-fifth of victims reporting an injury from intimate partner violence sought medical treatment following the injury.

- Intimate partner violence results in more than 18.5 million mental health care visits each year

- Witnessing violence between one’s parents or caretakers is the strongest risk factor of transmitting violent behavior from one generation to the next.

- Boys who witness domestic violence are twice as likely to abuse their own partners and children when they become adults.

- 30% to 60% of perpetrators of intimate partner violence also abuse children in the household

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Real Talk: Words To Live By!

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Real Talk: To Say or To Do?

Do more than merely getting through this day. Jump into it fully with vigor and enthusiasm. Do more than merely getting through your work. Find real joy in making a difference. When the purpose behind each day is just to get it over with, that dismal purpose can begin to take over your whole life. By contrast, when you put a little bit of joy and positive purpose into each moment, you get a whole lot of great and wonderful things filling your world. It only takes a fraction of a second to change your whole life and your whole world for the better. Are you ready to go beyond merely surviving and to fill each thought, each word, each action with the most magnificent possibilities of life? Life is exactly the way you choose to see it. Wherever you may be, whatever you may be doing, you have the opportunity to immediately and completely make life truly great. Open your eyes, look around, and awaken to all the best possibilities. Now is when you can live with all the richness you're able to imagine.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Real Talk: Do You!

If you are resisting life's goodness, then working harder at it will push that goodness farther away. Instead, learn to let go and to allow. Simply generating more activity and energy will not help you if that energy is pointed in a negative direction. Choose to re-direct all the energy and awareness in your life toward those things you value most. If the results you are getting fail to bring fulfillment, do not seek to merely create more results. Instead, find the path that truly fulfills your purpose. There is nothing to be gained from making life needlessly difficult. See the truth that life is beautiful, and align your energy and your actions with your very own expression of that truth. When you let yourself be yourself, richness flows easily and effortlessly and naturally through every moment. Your greatest accomplishments come from who you are. Let yourself be yourself. And you'll be as rich as anyone can ever be.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Real Talk: Quiet Power!

The strongest power has no need to show itself or to prove itself. It is quiet, calm, determined and unshakable. Boastfulness is the surest sign of weakness and insecurity. True confidence has no need to speak of itself. Authentic richness is endlessly generous. Anyone who has the need to appear rich suffers from a terribly painful poverty of the spirit. How do you fill your life with richness and power? Honestly be yourself, and give freely of yourself. Give up the fantasy of gaining benefit over others, for even if you could get it you would receive no real value from it. Instead, make it your business to promote, encourage, raise up, love and appreciate others at every opportunity. Pretending to be rich and powerful is agonizing work that incessantly erodes your spirit. Being truly rich and powerful fulfills your deepest longings and brings you fully to life.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Real Talk: Keep Giving!

The world will often discourage you from giving love. Give love anyway. Many times, despite your best efforts, you will not be understood. Keep giving it your best anyway. The treasures in life are not what you get back. Those things are only shadows of life's true value. The real treasures are what you're able to give of yourself. And as long as you give authentically, from the heart, with the best you have, it doesn't really matter what comes of it. It's nice to be acknowledged and respected and understood. Yet even when you're not acknowledged or understood, there is still great value in doing what you know is right, what you know is best. Smile a peaceful smile to the depth of your being. Be real, and know that all is well.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Real Talk: Follow the Yellow Brick Road!

The best way to figure out how to do something is to do it. Make the commitment to make it happen, and you'll start working your way through the details. Don't get bogged down speculating on how something will come about. Instead, get started on the best approach you have, and follow the path wherever it may lead. When traveling along a road, you can never see the entire road at once, but that doesn't really matter. What does matter is successfully making your way through the portion of the road that is right in front of you. Work through the things that are to be done right now, and you'll put yourself in position to handle the things that come along later. Travel down this section of the road, and you'll then be able to travel the next section, and the next. If you put all your energy into worrying about every little detail of how to reach your goal, you won't ever get started. Instead, put your energy into reminding yourself why you have chosen to go there, and then do whatever it takes along the way. You'll never know precisely how something is to be done until you actually do it. So go ahead, get started, and discover your own unique pathway to achievement.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault

Real Talk: Life Is What You Make It!

Even on the most dismal day there is stunning beauty to be found. Even in the most hopeless situation there is the opportunity for greatness. Life is not merely some arbitrary and random stuff that comes your way. Life is what you make it. Your circumstances are not someone else's fault. They are what you have chosen. Your future is not a foregone conclusion. It is whatever you choose it to be by the way you live right now. The dark, cold, grey days can be just as delightful as the warm, sunny ones. The later decades of life can be even more rich and fulfilling than your youth. Wherever you may find yourself, one thing is always certain. Your life is what you choose it to be, so choose the very best.

-- Ralph Marston

xoxo,

Garment Vault